I'm on my eighth week of maternity leave and during this time I have acclimated myself to raising a beautiful baby and moved into a mini mansion (it is to me anyway) complete with shiny new appliances. Well, I am trying to keep them shiny but I know it will only be a matter of weeks before they look like they came from a crack den. The day before yesterday, I entered into Stepford Wife territory when I couldn't get the surface of my oven shiny again after cooking up some opossum and made a special and speedy trip to Target for some heavy duty cleanser. I'm still working on getting that luster back.
I have lost track of the days of the week and packed out the trash can and recycling bin well in advance of their departure day. The side of my mansion looks like a landfill. It will take me a good 30 minutes or longer to get it all to the curb. Better hook up the Baby Bjorn and teach Willem how to open and close his hands so he can assist mama.
Yesterday morning, when little Will had easily gone down for his nap, I collected my purse and told my husband that I was going to run a couple of errands. I jumped in the truck, cranked up the radio and headed off only to realize that it wasn't 10 a.m. like the clock in the studio had said it was. Nine a.m. and the store I wanted to pillage wouldn't be open for another hour! My time is precious, people, and I immediately needed to decide how to make good use of it while I was away from mothering. I begrudgingly headed to Target 'cause we all know they have tons of crap we don't really need but have to have and they're conveniently open early to sell me said crap. Disgruntled, I found a parking place, wandered in and do you know what I saw? All of the Halloween candy HALF PRICE! This includes candy corn. Thanks to the confusion of daylight savings time, I am stocked with enough candy crack corn to last until next Halloween! By this time next year, I will have the toothless grin of a jack-o-lantern.
On an unrelated note, a real estate agent left her business card on our door with a note on the back saying she has a client who would be interested in buying our house. It's either a fan of Barney the Dinosaur or someone who is severely color blind and don't you know I'm going to call her to find out!
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1 comment:
Oh God - one morning I RUSHED out as I heard the garbage truck coming and promptly threw out the permanent filter of my coffee pot but thankfully retained the bag of dirty diapers for the next week.
It gets better.
Kristen
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