Roll 'Em Up

I can’t sleep so I come downstairs to read the news online that I missed today. This leads me to horrifying stories of the latest missing children which then prompts me to do a search of my neighborhood registered sex offenders (City of Austin has a handy database complete with easy access to the addresses and latest creepy pics of your neighborhood pedophiles…there a couple a little too close by my casa, btw) and then I think…”Hey, what are the latest crime stats around here, too?” Yeah, I’m ready for some good sleep now.

Edible Garden

For the past five months or so I’ve been stalking my neighbor’s garden two doors down. Five months, you query? Yes, five months. This includes those winter months when, according to my yard, nothing grows. This seemingly lonely dude with a very frisky calico cat has one hell of a green thumb and I can see the digit from my kitchen window. I’m the neighbor standing on her tippy toes at the kitchen sink straining to see what he’s up to in that bountiful Eden of his while unknowingly scrubbing the color off the dinner plate in my soapy hands. A couple of weeks ago I was inspired by his stately fruits and veggies so I went to Home Depot and took great care in choosing my small collection of tomatoes, herbs and a Serrano pepper plant. I put them in massive pots on a ledge so the dog couldn’t annihilate them as soon I turned my back. I watered them and cheered for them and already things are looking pretty bad. Brown spots, yellow leaves and little growth plague my sprouts. The neighbor’s garden boxes, on the other hand, taunt me from afar with their deep green color and bushy appearance. Why does it have to be this way?

On a positive gardening note, the tot and I spent the morning at his school working on a gardening project. We built a compost area, a place for melons and a lovely little area for veggies to grow. 12 kiddos or so ran amok with plastic shovels, hoes and watering cans. Although at certain moments it was like herding cats, we got a lot accomplished and in a couple of months they will be eating goodies they have grown themselves. Alice Waters would be so proud. Yeay team!

Chaos Unleashed

Since I am the queen of chaos, I seem to subconsciously enjoy making things way more chaotic than they need to be. I don’t mean that I’m an over-reacting, control-freak sort of martyr type (that’s only part of the time). I mean that when I am in the midst of intense, brain pureeing details of my job times 1,000, I seem to find at least one more mammoth project with numerous details to add to the mix. Last year is was a complete house remodel and birth of a new baby. This year it's 90 events that are to happen within a 9-day period in March and a complete overhaul done of our front and back yards. Months ago I spent some time inartistically drawing out my dream yard, something suitable to our budget and neighborhood. After a bit of searching and some outrageous bids from landscaping companies that took my ideas to a whole new level (“How about a floating deck, one that seems to hover over the surface of the yard?”), we settled on a company whose owner is a friend of the family, does good work, and we’d get the “Friends & Family” deal. This deal, however, is still a major wallop to the pocketbook and we’re currently looking for a job for W. After a couple of weeks had passed, the crew showed up on the scene and, armed with an orange can of spray paint, marked up the lot. I came home at the end of the day and it looked like our yard had been tagged by a handful of artistically challenged gang members. I found a few of the markings to be incorrect and used the can of spray paint to make some adjustments. This included accidentally spraying the wall of the studio out back. Nice.

And so it rained for 40 days and 40 nights and then it froze and all of the landscaping demarcations washed away and had to be done again. One sunny day the crew arrived (one of them is in touch with his inner pirate complete with bandana, goatee with long mustache and a dangling gold loop earring the size of a silver dollar…he totally rules!) and began unloading chunks of stark white limestone. I had to go to work and wasn’t able to witness what was about to occur but later in the day I received a frantic phone call from the Hubs. “Did you tell them they could do what they just did to the yard? I mean, it looks awful. You gotta talk to them. I hate what they’ve done!” I came home later that day to see my two trees barricaded by a short wall of limestone in the shape of an “o” and a wall of the same stuff outlining the front of our house framing the beds of the yard. I realized we could go to battle with the neighborhood and be safe in our own personal version of the Alamo. Egads! I immediately got on the horn and told our family friend/landscape company owner that this was not going to work and all of the rock had to come out. Our tiny yard couldn’t support such weight, such bulk and besides, we live in a purple and orange house with straight lines and squares. What does stark white limestone in the circlular shapes got to do with it? So, confused and befuddled, the crew dismantled their beautiful work and quietly laughed at the Gringa who wants only metal edging around the beds. I do have to admit that this talented bunch has replaced our front sidewalk with same said stark white limestone and their craftsmanship is incredible. We are now the proud owners of one of the sexiest sidewalks in the ‘hood. Now if people would just keep their muddy feet off of it.

The nightmare before...
















And the nightmare during...
































The crew. The pirate is the clown in the yellow shirt.

A Dysfunctional Debut

I have finally managed to find the time (and many reasons) to create a blog. For months, it has been a manifestation eloquently written in my mind on a daily basis but actually getting this thing to become a reality has been a challenge. So, now, here it is and it feels pretty dang good.

I have only recently begun reading other peoples blogs, namely "mommie" blogs, and find them to be a great outlet for the quirks of everyday life. In my case, things have gotten very quirky. I am in my 26th week of pregnancy and have a burning desire (yes, similar to prenatal heartburn) to write about this very surreal and life changing event. In addition to my child's impending arrival and very present state of being in my belly, my husband and I are in the midst of remodeling our home (it MIGHT be ready by the time Junebug makes its appearance). This situation has forced us to relocate temporarily down the street from the chaotic scene and we can now view the construction from a safe distance. Right behind our shack-to-a-castle dwelling, an overzealous developer is cramming 10 3-story condos in a lot once home to a peacefull collective of homeless beer-in-a-bag drinkers. I miss their jungle of privacy and mystery. Now, with all underbrush and trees removed, the temperature on our block it 10 degrees hotter, much noiser, and condusive to construction workers helping themselves to our backyard contents (I hope you enjoy the patio bricks!).

So in the coming hours, days, weeks, years even, I will describe the details of what it's like in this little world of mine and I truly hope you find some enjoyment, entertainment, and encouragement in it. Anon.